Ends and losses are always painful, they leave a void within, a vacuum that never can be filled come what may, even when time comes jauntily by and offers to be the proverbial healer. I seem to have lost a special part of me the other day and yes I feel the vacuum where a friend used to be earlier. Now I may not have been a responsible daughter or the feel good sister, but I have always felt (or maybe I should start using past tense)….so I used to always believe and feel good about being a true friend, a real friend, someone with whom you can laugh and cry and I genuinely felt I was one such. However now that is lost. So how did I manage to lose the friend that I always believed I was? Did someone better come along, someone a better friend than me? Well you don’t end being a friend if someone better comes along, you just remain all the more, no matter who comes along. Then? I didn’t cease being a friend by myself, but the joy, the love, the right, the responsibility of being a friend was taken away from me, I was declared to not have the capability of being a friend. I therefore feel the loss so strongly. So now there is a vacuum, where the friend in me earlier used to be and I do not know what to fill it with, because where will I find another friend like me?
Some damages are irreparable, my damaged emotion of being a friend for instance.
-Monica
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recollected and old song=
ReplyDeleteYou've got a friend in me
When the road looks rough ahead
And you're miles and miles
From your nice warm bed
Just remember what your old pal said
Boy, you've got a friend in me'
,,anyways, i have always been fascinated by eternity, maybe because i know it doesn't exist in this changing, fragile world..
whenever i feel like making a promise to eternity, i check if i am getting ahead of myself, and i say, till foreseeable future, according to assumption that the patterns and logic that makes me say it remains valid..it's spoken or left unsaid, but understood.it's like adding up numbers in a progression which goes till eternity..
moral of the story, neither the friends, nor the voids last till eternity..so we let the life change, and try and hope that something interesting comes up..
Thanks Ankur....
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